Grieving Partners Share Stories of Love Lost to War
Translated & summarized from Srugim by baba
Three years after the October 7th attacks, women who lost fiancés and boyfriends in the ensuing war shared their stories of love and loss. The "He Left a Partner Behind" association reports 412 such bereavements, with many victims under 21. Rani Bat Zion Kafah lost her fiancé, Yossef Chaim Raboch, to friendly fire on October 7th. Maya Hadadi's boyfriend, Ido Appel, died in Gaza on May 28, 2024, after a final birthday call. The association offers support to these partners, whose grief is often overlooked.
The story in 6 lines · by baba
- 412 partners have lost loved ones since the start of the war, according to the "He Left a Partner Behind" association.
- Rani Bat Zion Kafah's fiancé, Yossef Chaim Raboch, was killed by friendly fire on October 7th.
- Maya Hadadi's boyfriend, Ido Appel, died in Gaza on May 28, 2024, after a final birthday conversation.
- Fifty-seven percent of those bereaved were under 21 at the time of their loss.
- Ten percent of bereaved partners were engaged or planning a wedding.
- The "He Left a Partner Behind" association provides support to partners whose grief is often unrecognized.
As Israel marks three years since the October 7th attacks and the subsequent war, women who lost their partners in the fighting shared their stories. The "Srugim" studio hosted these women, highlighting the profound impact of the conflict on romantic relationships. According to the "He Left a Partner Behind" association, 412 partners have lost their loved ones since the war began, with 118 of those deaths occurring on October 7th itself. Fifty-seven percent of those bereaved were under 21 at the time of their loss, and 10% were engaged or planning a wedding.
Rani Bat Zion Kafah recounted the loss of her fiancé, Sergeant Yossef Chaim Raboch, a 19-year-old from Kiryat Arba and a national Tae Kwon Do champion. The couple, together for five years since age 14 and two months from their wedding, were visiting a friend on the evening of October 7th when an explosion occurred. Raboch was killed by friendly fire from a childhood friend serving in the Border Police, an incident under investigation by the Police Internal Investigations Department. "He was the most perfect boyfriend in the world," Kafah said tearfully.
Maya Hadadi shared the story of her boyfriend, Sergeant Major Ido Appel, a 21-year-old combat soldier from Moshav Tsofar. They met during their national service and became a couple. Appel, who loved the desert, had been wounded by shrapnel in Gaza but insisted on returning to the fight. The day before he was killed, Appel celebrated his 21st birthday. Hadadi managed a brief birthday call with him, during which he jokingly texted about a song his parents chose for him, saying, "Thanks a lot, love you, but what is this cheesy song?" This was their last conversation. The next day, May 28, 2024, Appel and two other soldiers died when the structure they entered in southern Gaza was booby-trapped.
Einat Sagie Alfassa, a board member of the "He Left a Partner Behind" association, also participated. She lost her partner, Shimshon Zeidner, in 1994, long before the concept of a bereaved partner was recognized in Israeli society. The association provides support to young people who have lost their partners, offering a therapeutic framework and a supportive community. "Bereaved partners have lost not only the person they loved, but together with him, the future they imagined together was cut short," explained Adv. Adi Alon Scheinberg, the association's CEO. "Since they had not yet managed to marry, their place in the circle of bereavement is not always self-evident. We are here to provide them with a therapeutic envelope and a supportive community, so they can return to life alongside the grief, not in its shadow."
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