Relationship Coach Explains Why Modern Singles Struggle to Commit and How to Overcome Fears
In the podcast "Katan Alay," host Hana Katan interviewed Yael Zakovitz, a relationship coach and emotional therapist from Bnei Brak, about the challenges facing singles today in finding lasting relationships. Zakovitz explained that prolonged singleness often stems not from a lack of opportunities or desire to marry, but from underlying fears, limiting beliefs, and conflicting desires that weaken internal motivation and extend the search for a partner.
Zakovitz highlighted how internal perceptions accompany individuals on dates, influencing their judgments. Fears about losing freedom, sacrificing dreams, or marriage being a burden can cause people to misinterpret minor flaws as dealbreakers. She emphasized that healthy relationships should empower individuals rather than restrict them, countering the common notion that one must fully realize themselves before marrying.
The conversation also addressed the modern woman's independence, which, while positive, can create confusion about the need for partnership. Zakovitz reassured that wanting intimacy and support is not a weakness but a natural part of building a home. She also discussed a common contradiction where women desire a confident, leading partner but fear dominance or lack of consideration, stressing that leadership and sensitivity can coexist.
Zakovitz further noted the pressure women face regarding fertility and aging, which can generate anxiety and hinder dating. She encouraged embracing inner confidence and calm to approach relationships more openly. A key message was that individuals are "greater than their life story," urging people not to let past traumas or family patterns dictate their romantic futures.
Finally, Zakovitz challenged the belief in a single perfect match, explaining that differences between partners can foster growth rather than signal incompatibility. The discussion concluded with a story of a man who married later in life, realizing he needed to mature before committing, illustrating that delays in relationships can be part of personal development. Zakovitz affirmed that today's generation seeks meaningful, conscious, and sustainable connections, requiring courage to confront fears and release outdated beliefs to build fulfilling partnerships.
