Israeli Grandparents Step In As Parents After October 7 Massacres

Grandparents across Israel are unexpectedly becoming parents again, raising grandchildren orphaned by the October 7 Hamas attacks. Twenty-seven children lost both parents in the violence, leaving their elderly relatives to navigate complex emotional and practical challenges.

Many of these grandparents, some in their 70s, are grappling with the immense grief of losing their own children while simultaneously caring for traumatized grandchildren. They describe living in a state of "illusion" that they are merely babysitting, only to be jolted by the reality that their children will never return. The children themselves are asking difficult questions, such as "Where is my mom?" and "Why is this happening to me?" expressing a deep longing for their lost parents.

One grandmother, Eti Getah, is raising her two grandchildren, Nave, 8, and Rif, 4, whose mother was killed fleeing the Nova music festival. She recounts a heartbreaking moment when Rif asked her to bring her mother down from heaven. Getah also shares the struggle of feeling disconnected from other young mothers, as her own life has been irrevocably altered.

Gila and Reuven Chen are caring for their granddaughters Menor, 15, and Neri, 12, whose parents were killed while attending a festival. Gila admits to screaming in anguish during the first year, overwhelmed by the pain and unable to bear seeing the children's fear. She struggles to resume a parental role, noting she no longer makes traditional dishes.

Eti and Eli Bracha are raising their grandsons Eliav, 10, and Rafael, who recently had his bar mitzvah. Their daughter Gal and her husband Naji were murdered at Nova. They recall the immense difficulty of telling the children about the loss of both parents, describing the children's screams and tears. Eliav tearfully asked his grandmother, "Why is this happening to me? I'm a small child. I want my mom and dad." Eti Bracha also grieves privately, crying alone while doing laundry late at night.

The the Son killed on October 7 family's story is particularly complex. Dror and Yonat the Son killed on October 7 were killed in their home in Kibbutz Be'eri, and two of their three children, Noam and Alma, were kidnapped to Gaza. Another grandchild, Liam, was also kidnapped. Grandparents Yuval and Dorita the Son killed on October 7, aged 75, are now raising three teenagers, a role they haven't filled in decades. When the children returned from captivity, they didn't know their parents were dead. Yuval the Son killed on October 7 describes the grandchildren mourning not only their parents but also the loss of their grandparents in their previous roles.

Julio and Gloria are raising their grandson Aviel, 8, whose single mother, Yvon, was killed at Nova. Gloria expresses fear about what will happen to Aviel when they are no longer alive, as he constantly tells her he is sad and misses his mother. Julio notes the physical and emotional toll of raising a young child at their age, while Aviel expresses a desire to grow wings to reach his mother.