Reservists' Families Face New Battle Returning Home After Service

The return home for Israeli reservists after extended periods of service, particularly since October 7, presents a significant challenge, often becoming a "front in itself," according to Shaul Akavia, founder of the "HaBayit" (The Home) association. Many families have adapted to life without the reservist, with children becoming accustomed to a parent's absence and spouses learning to manage independently, leading to a difficult reintegration process.

Akavia, a retired pilot and former school principal, established "HaBayit" a decade ago to support families. Since the Hamas attack, the organization has focused on reservists and career soldiers' families, with 450 volunteers providing support for about six months, either in person or remotely. The association aims to address the deeper consequences of prolonged service on family life, including relationships, parenting, finances, and the division of household roles, beyond immediate financial aid or gestures.

One poignant example involved a father who served months in Gaza. Upon his return, he perceived his family as well-adjusted, but his wife saw a different reality. Their young son, previously close to his father, became distant, associating the uniform with the father's departure. Akavia highlights this as a painful gap, where the returning soldier expects the home they left, but the home has learned to function without them, sometimes too well.

The association's support is not formal psychological or marital therapy but acts as a bridge for families not yet ready for professional help, referring them when deeper intervention is needed. Akavia states their goal is to "treat the trauma so it doesn't become post-trauma." The challenges extend to career reintegration, with some reservists finding it difficult to return to their previous work, like a former tech team leader struggling to sit at a computer after months in the field.

"HaBayit" also notes the overlooked needs of single reservists, young men in their early twenties whose formative years are consumed by repeated reserve duty, potentially returning to empty apartments. These individuals may also bear a greater burden by allowing married colleagues with families to return home sooner. The demand for the association's services has surged, with support growing from 220 families in 2025 to an expected 600 this year, with plans to assist 2,000 families annually.