Lawyer Warns Divorce Victories Can Lead to Greater Losses in Family Life

Attorney and mediator Ranit Oknin-Kabsa highlights that winning a divorce case may come at a high personal and familial cost. Many enter divorce proceedings seeking justice, but often find the price paid in time, money, and emotional toll outweighs the legal victory. She stresses that the most important question is not how to win the case, but how life will look after the divorce.

Divorce is unique among legal processes because the relationship between the parties does not end with the court ruling. Ex-spouses often remain co-parents, making joint decisions about their children’s education, health, and family events. This post-divorce phase can be the most challenging, yet many focus solely on winning the court battle.

Oknin-Kabsa explains that courts are designed to resolve legal disputes, not to provide emotional justice or repair broken relationships. Even parties who prevail in court may feel they have lost due to ongoing parental conflict and personal strain. To address this, Israeli law requires most family disputes to begin with mediation and conflict resolution sessions before court proceedings, aiming to reduce harm and explore cooperative solutions.

However, some cases necessitate judicial intervention, such as those involving domestic violence, asset concealment, child welfare concerns, or bad faith actions. In such situations, legal proceedings protect the vulnerable party and children. Oknin-Kabsa advises distinguishing between battles driven by legitimate needs and those fueled by hurt or retaliation.

She recommends that before making significant legal moves, individuals ask if the step advances their true goals, if the costs justify the benefits, and how the decision will affect life five years later. Ultimately, success in divorce is measured not only by court outcomes but by the ability to maintain important family ties, financial stability, and the opportunity to start anew.