Husband Wants to Attend Family Wedding but Wife Fears Managing Kids Alone
A man wished to fly to a family wedding without their children, but his wife expressed strong reluctance, saying she could not handle their two young children alone for two days. The couple has a baby under one year old and another child nearing five. The wedding is about a four-hour flight away, and although the husband admitted he is not very close to the cousin getting married, he saw it as a rare chance for much of the family to gather.
The wife refused to fly with him or even allow him to hire a babysitter to assist her during his absence, fearing everything might "fall apart" without sufficient support. She insisted the simplest solution was for him not to go. The husband recalled that earlier in the year, his wife was invited to two child-free weddings lasting several days. He encouraged her to attend and promised to care for the children alone, but she ultimately chose not to go and was upset about the child-free policy.
As the discussion unfolded, the husband revealed that his wife struggles with ADHD and executive functioning difficulties, which can overwhelm her even with routine tasks. She is still breastfeeding the infant, and their most trusted babysitters, her parents, had already planned to travel that weekend. She had previously undergone treatment but stopped, is not interested in medication, and currently lacks time to resume therapy.
Public reactions were mixed, with some arguing the husband should attend the wedding, especially since he offered to pay for help, while others emphasized the wife's feelings of overwhelm and possible postpartum challenges needing professional attention. Following the post, the husband updated that his wife spoke with her sister and is considering combining family help with a trusted babysitter. She might feel comfortable if she secures enough support, and he stated he will not go unless she feels adequately supported.
They also discussed her postpartum condition; she denied depression but acknowledged anxiety. The husband offered to facilitate professional help, including taking time off work to support her. The decision on whether he will attend the wedding hinges on whether they can build a support network that allows him to be away without causing a crisis at home.
