The Bobov Hasidic community’s "Chaim Shel Shalom" committee is rolling out a new initiative aimed at sharply reducing the rising costs of wedding celebrations, especially the weekday sheva brachot meals that burden families after a wedding. In a detailed notice sent to the community, the committee said it recently surveyed dozens of in-laws about the weekday sheva brachot period and found overwhelming agreement that the expense is heavy, unnecessary, and falls largely on grandparents before becoming an additional burden on the couple’s parents.
Based on those findings, the committee is promoting, for now as a recommendation rather than a binding rule, a new model starting from Rosh Chodesh Elul 5786. Instead of holding two large communal sheva brachot meals during the week, families would host a simple dinner at home for the bride and groom only. According to the plan, these meals would be held in a private, very limited format, whether arranged by grandparents, parents, or other close relatives.
The only allowed guests would be the bride and groom themselves, with no additional invitees. The one exception is if either of them feels the need to bring along one additional married couple for comfort, but no more than that. The committee said that, according to the rabbinic judges of the community’s beit horaah, there is no need and no halachic basis to bring a special minyan of men for sheva brachot during the weekday celebrations.
To encourage participation, the committee is offering an incentive for the first 60 families who adopt the new standard. Each will receive a $1,500 credit to help cover wedding-related expenses, including the banquet hall and the shabbat sheva brachot venue, and the bride and groom will also receive a $500 gift card for purchases.
